Tears

Life brings exciting new discoveries yea? I'm hurting and in pain.

Necessary?

My love whom I fall in love with unexpectedly, your immature and inconsiderate actions affected me deeply.

Have you ever consider how your own actions and thoughts could affect my feelings?

You are the least person I could think of that will re-deleted me from facebook and un-follow me from instagram. If it was accidentally as claimed, deletion from 2 different social media was too coincidence.

I hope you understand someday that you may have broken my heart but not my love for you. And I hope this genuine feelings will regain your lost faith in loving someone worthy someday. Always remember, don't be short changed.

Career Quarterlife Crisis In Twenty Sense

"What are you working as now? " and "How much are you earning now?"  I have this conversation so many times that I feel this is epidemic.

Being a twenty something woman with no family of my own and aplentiful of time to carve out a career, it can be tough on the bad days to establish an identity of my own.

I am at a point where I face alot of anxiety and a sense of being adrift and lost when all problems come to me at once.

Each time when I change a job, it is also a change of a career where I got to get out of my own comfort zone and start things anew. It is almost like changing lives.

This quarter life crisis is a struggle of not just a career, but to a perfect career.

I do not know where life and opportunities might bring me to in a near future. But I am sure it will be wonderful be it good or bad. Each turns, each change would definitely make me a better person as long as I have the right attitude.

Unspoken Feelings

Have you ever likes someone so much but decided to keep them inside your heart cause it is for the best?

It is so painful but I'm understanding.

Leaving Some People In Your Past

I have trouble giving up on people.

And it makes me sad to know that people could easily abandon a friendship or relationship like a pinch of salt. Being abandon is a kind of feeling that makes tears swell up at the back of your throat. The sadness that lingers and lingers and hoping one day it would just fade away with time. It is not an easy thing to accept.

If someone is not meant to be in your life, they will not stay put and will not be convienced otherwise. The last time I went through this, I come to understand that we are always in constant motion. We change every single day. Some relationships are more forgiving, some just ceased abruptly. Through all these bad experiences, I grew older and wiser and became more selective about whom I gave my time and effort to. I found good friends that are not afraid to admit that they do not want to lose me and kept them close.

Instead of spending time wondering about my loss, I took all these effort to nuture the rest. Surrounding myself with people who makes me a better person than I was yesterday.

 It is true when they say holding onto something irreparable feels worse.

Love In Twenty Sense

Ever wonder how different your life would be if that one thing never happened? I do.

A recent incident inspires me to pen my thoughts so that maybe someday I would look back on the good times often enough to remind myself to take pride in the growth that has happen to me in these few months or years. 

Letting go of a bad relationships can be complicated, it is almost like experiencing death of all sorts. Even if you are coping perfectly well before they even came into your life.

2 years full of tears was how long it took me to move on. Just when I thought that things are getting better, I fall in love with someone whom I was not suppose to and my life got into pit bottom once again.

Maybe someday I will begin to live again, but not so until I have given grief its time.